Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
