My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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