Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Randomize
