I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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