I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
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Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
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There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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