the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
