been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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