so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
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