Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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