This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
