He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
