I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize