White coat. Heels.
1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
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