Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
just tell him i said nine months
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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