mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize