I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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