i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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