Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
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