either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
