We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
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