i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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