They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize