The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers