I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize