just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
