now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
whose ass print is on the piano?
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
