why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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