You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize