Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
