Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Randomize
