glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
