So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
