she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
