so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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