We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
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