...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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