i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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