If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
