i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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