Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
i think i just lost a toe
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize