Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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