Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
