remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.