I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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