All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize
