: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
