Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I look better un-naked...
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
