Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
