somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Use "feeling words"
Yay
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
