I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
They are going to name an STD after you.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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