I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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