sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I want a musical about memes.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
